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Things Women Will
Never Say…
You know, I've been complaining a lot lately. I don't blame
you for ignoring me.
That was fun, when will all of your friends be over to
watch pornos again?
The new girl in my office is a stripper, I invited her over
for dinner on Friday.
While you were in the bathroom, they went for it on fourth
down and missed. If they can hold them to a field goal they'll still
cover.
Bar food again?? Kick ass!!!!
I liked that wedding even more than ours. Your
ex-girlfriend has class.
That girl is wearing the same outfit as I am. Cool, I'm
gonna go over and talk to her.
I love hearing stories about your old girlfriends, tell me
more.
I like using this new lawn mower so much more than the old
one, what a wonderful Valentine's Day!
Let's just leave the toilet seat "up" at all times, then
you don't have to mess with it anymore.
It's only the third quarter; you should order a couple more
pitchers.
Honey, come here! Watch me do a Tequila Shot off of
Stephanie's bare ass!
I'm so happy with my new hairstyle; I don't think I'll ever
change it again.
Damn! I love it when my pillow smells like your cigars and
scotch.
You passed out before brushing your teeth again, ya big
silly.
You are so much smarter than my father.
If we're not going to have sex, then you have to let me
watch Sports Center.
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